Leisure Time Essays

by thangngovan
(vietnam)


Hi everyone. I am a beginner in IELTS, and studying by myself because I have no condition to take a class. I will do IELTS in next 2 months, so I really need your help, specially in checking essay. Below is my first essay on leisure time, every comment is a helpful advice for me!


Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.


Leisure time is necessary for people after working and studying hard, and there are various recreation activities to do base on oneself purpose. Many people support the methods helping the mind getting better, while others endorse the thinking to rest in free time, but it is more effective if we take part in outside activities.

It is true that people can improve their personal ability by practicing pursuits improving the mind. By doing the word puzzles, this activity helps us raise the logical thinking and solve problems at work more effectively. On the other hand, we can wider our knowledge and absorb more information from many kind of books, the mental health will be better.

Standing at the other view, putting the mind at rest by enjoying media entertainment, people reduce the stress. After long day at work or school, we usually feel tired and need to relax. There are many channels such as watching films, listening music and playing games, our mind will balance again.

However, the pursuits of two sorts above have some disadvantages, such as we feel more stressful when practicing the mind or to be not conscious if using electronic entertaining methods, we should take outdoor actions. When enjoying outside events, for instance, doing exercise or playing sports bring about our physical health will be better, the mind will be refreshed and having energies for new works.

In summary, doing activities, improving our mind in leisure time will enhance our thinking but perhaps, also lead to feeling more stressful. Meanwhile, laying the mind to rest helping us reduce work’s pressure, however, we can feel graver. Personally, participating in outside pursuits is good for both metal and physical health.

(282 words)

____________________________


my email: thang.nv1904@gmail.com, if you can, please send me your checking via this email, thank you so much.

Comments for Leisure Time Essays

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Jul 05, 2013
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Essay is excellent
by: Anonymous

Hi,

You have written excellent essay and covered everything. Here are very few suggestions that can be added to improve some marks as per examiner's expectation.

1. You may add 2-3 conditional sentences (for example: if, although, even)

2. Complex sentences are also required in essay task 2 such as "not only but also" more and more type)

I am not sure if you already received your desired result and i am late to reply you!

Thanks,

Jul 07, 2013
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Argumentative essay
by: Dr Ray Connors

5 paragraphs are good for an argumentative essay-

First paragraph: Restate the question but use different wording, AND give an idea of YOUR opinion.

Second: Agree with the question statement and give reasons-support.

Third: Show why the "other" opinion has advantages.

Fourth: Show why YOUR opinion is the RIGHT one- use examples etc

Fifth: Conclusion- Restate the argument and once again give your opinion.

These type essays work simply in 3 parts:-

Para 1: Tell the reader what you are going to say

2,3,4: Tell it

5: State what you have just said.

Jan 27, 2015
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
useful
by: Anonymous

it is very useful

Sep 27, 2016
Rating
starstarstarstar
good.keep it up!
by: namith

I like this short essay on leisure time!!!!!!

I think you should involve some more points to make it a grand one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish you best of luck!!!

regards:namith



Oct 14, 2016
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
thanks
by: Azerbaijani

excellent essay thanks

Click here to add your own comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.



Pressure at Work and Time to Relax

by Mahesh Senadheera
(Sri Lanka)

Many people think that nowadays people are being subjected to more and more pressure in their work and thus are having less and less time to relax.

What is your opinion?


yes, it is true that people are having less time to relax as they are subjected to more pressure in their work. it has been the routine of the average man to wake up early in the morning, to leave the home for work, to work to dusk and return home late night. Thus it is reasonable to say that people are being subjected to pressure and they have no time even to dream of relax.

Due to the distance of the working place, a number of people find it difficult to reach there on time. So it is customory for them to leave the home early in the morning. To finish the daily course of the duty, they work as machines. Very often they fail to complete the duty of the day. The result is the amount of work on his shoulder is graduly climbing up. Consequently, intense of pressure is going up. Whether he is a government or prviate employ, this is the common situation. As a result, he has been deprived of his time to relax an refresh.

On the other hand, people in this ultra modern generation are engaging in a very hectic life style because of their personal needs. They have been helpless in the management of their time. Load of the work, duty of the personal and the social life is pressurizing them moment by moment. Unwillingly, duty of the family and children become agrave problem if they do the work for living properly and vice versa. It leaves them only pressure and stress.

According to the facts mentioned above, many people in the society today are being deprived of their time to be with the family members, to relax and refresh.

Please feedback on my Leisure Time Essay

Click here to post comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.

Best Use of Leisure Time

by ahmet
(istanbul)

Please provide me with some feedback on my Leisure Time Essay.

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles, other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time.

Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.


Many people believe that it is significant using spare time for things that enhance the mind, for instance reading and doing word puzzles. the others think that it is vital to relax the mind during spare time. In my opinion, I agree that people should use leisure time for activities which improve the mind.

On the one hand, some people have very exhausting job. Therefore, they would like to relax during leisure time, so they do not want to do anything within this time. They think they need to rest. Moreover, many people are lazy, for this reason they do not keen to do activities to improve the mind. For instance reading a book and doing Sudoku puzzles.

On the other hand, many people have stressful job too, but they would like to enhance the mind. Therefore, they do many things within leisure time. Such as reading a novel, solving puzzles, doing exercises which are useful for improving the mind. I think that people who utilize spare time doing activities that boost the mind are more successful than others who love to use spare time for relaxing.

Finally, in my opinion, people should use their leisure time to improve the mind. For this reason people should do anything which is useful for enhancing the mind. Moreover, I would argue that, people should hard working not to be idle. So they always doing something to be more successful. Furthermore, I think some activities are so relaxing while they improve the mind. Such as doing Sudoku puzzles.

In conclusion, I agree that people should do activities that improve the mind during leisure time. Because, while that they are performing activities for improving the mind, the activities can contribute to job achievement. Moreover, I think, leisure time should be used effectively since it is so precious.

Comments for Best Use of Leisure Time

Average Rating starstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Nov 27, 2014
Rating
starstarstar
good essay
by: Hassan

Good job!! needs some editing.

Dec 02, 2014
Rating
starstarstarstar
leisure time
by: Anonymous

Word which you use leisure should not be repeated again and again and one more thing, you were not supposed to use difficult words

Dec 05, 2014
Rating
starstarstar
Average
by: Adeep kaur

THE IDEA YOU GAVE IN ESSAY IS GOOD .

BUT IT IS NOT WRITTEN IN APPROPRIATE MANNER...

SO JUST NEED ORGANIZED IN A STRUCTURED FORM.

Jun 25, 2015
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Excellent
by: Md Faiyaz Shams

Wow ..... what a nice essay ,, it really influenced me to use the leisure to improve our mind

Click here to add your own comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.

Work Pressure and Leisure Time

by liv


Many people think that nowadays people are being subjected to more and more pressure in their work and thus are having less and less time to relax.

What is your opinion?


Today, almost all the people are declining their leisure time rather they are over occupied and concentrated working.

First reason is competition inside the work place. Some people are treasuring their job, which some might replace their position anytime due to jealousy and envy, so workers are devoting their full time in working. For example, a nurse supervisor does not want to return to become a ordinary nurse, in order to maintained her rank. She should do her best to protect her position. Second reason is like expenditures. Some people are busy working for two or three jobs in order to support unnecessary necessities in their life, such as buying brand new car, “beyond your means”, meaning in their life that the salary is not enough to support any expenses. This shows that people re occupied working because they need to pay their debt.

In my daily observation and opinion, workers should think that money is not all the matters for the reason that life is so short, which is why, as long as we still alive we need to enjoy whatever we have, in simple or extravagant way. Moreover, material things are easily can come and go and these things are not important in order to become happy. Giving importance of spending leisure time like going to watch cinema and visiting abroad so that we will feel happy.

I therefore conclude, life is go on, so we need to enjoy single moment of our family, friends and people that surrounds us, rather than having the work position with pressure and in the end, we miss the happiness in our life.

Comments for Work Pressure and Leisure Time

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Nov 30, 2014
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Leisure Time Essay
by: IELTS buddy

In regards to this essay, the most important thing you need to do is improve your introduction.

It does only need to be 2 or 3 sentences, but you have introduced the essay very poorly.

Grammar errors make it confusing and you don't seem to have a thesis.

Learn about writing an IELTS essay introduction here.

Dec 01, 2014
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
comment
by: liv

Thank you for your response, although i would like to know how about my body paragraphs and conclusion, if i did it well? thank you again.. i will take exam this 2nd week of dec. thank you.

Dec 05, 2014
Rating
starstarstarstar
maintained quality of language
by: amritha

nice essay, easily understandable to new learners and good sentence constriction

Dec 05, 2014
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Leisure Essay
by: IELTS buddy

The content and structure of the body paragraphs and conclusion are ok. You have topic sentences, explain things with examples and answer the questions to a reasonable extent.

But you do have quite a few grammar issues you need to work on.

I can't point them all out so you would need someone to take a look for you so you know where you need to improve in this respect.

Hope the test went well at the weekend.

Let us know your score.

Click here to add your own comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.

Work and Relaxation

by Long
(hong kong )

Many people think that nowadays people are being subjected to more and more pressure in their work and thus are having less and less time to relax.

What is your opinion?


Leisure time is essential in people's lives especially in this busy world, the valuable leisure time is getting less. However, people have different views on how to utilise their time. Some suggest to have mind improving activities yet the others believe resting is better. This essay will discuss on both sides of arguments.

Some people believe having brain stimulation by activities can help in children development. Young people usually learn academic knowledges from school. Other than traditional learning, reading novels or science fiction stimulate their imagination, having mini- games such as world puzzles, Sudoku can facilitate their logical thinking. Multiple players' activities also provide platform for building teamwork. people can fully utilise their recreational time in order to improve their intelligence, which is important to become competitive in this crucial society.

However, on the other hand, there are some strongly assert that resting is fundamental for leisure purpose. Nowadays, working over 50 hours a week is commonly seen elsewhere. Therefore, having such brain demanding activities after work or study would be a big burden to the participants. Instead, activities such as exercising, listening to music or even taking a nap would help recharging brain by simply resting. It is obvious that our brains require adequate rest to function in optimal level, people can concentrate on their works or learning after relaxation.

In my opinion, both sides have their meets. Resting is significant between working intervals, while mind improving games boost brain development. Hence, I suggest people should employ mind stimulating activities if mentally capable. if people who get fatigue from using brain, mild activities would be good options to recharge.

Please feedback on my Leisure Time Essay

Click here to post comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.

Leisure Time and Study

by Orifjon
(Tashkent)

In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard on their studies.

What do you think are the causes for this?

What solutions can you suggest?


From the perspective of history countries were divided into several levels according to their inner development and status. Nowadays current issue is still in trend. Basically, there are some countries where students study under pressure, not having time to relax or do some leisure activities. In this essay, major reasons and possible solutions will be outlined according to question above.

In my modest opinion, the basis of current issue lies in deep roots of education system of discussing countries. More clearly, governments -when planning the system - were now aware of students, who will then have to study following the government's system. Pattern of education was schemed involving positive sides only for governments rather than students. Some countries, for instance, are strictly critisized in planning the system compressed in order to spend less budget of organisation. This is, obviously, the most frightening way of objection of humanity's civil rights. One possible approach can be found in altering the way governments look at future of their own. In other words, the fact that proves that young generation is government's main stick point in the future should agitate them.

The second and the main reason, however, touches the field of schools, universities and other educational organisations. The difference between humankind and animals is only - human moral ability to fell and think. By this argument, students are not tend to feel moral help from educational institutions. 2/3 of all educational institutions forgot about "motivation", "inspiration" and "encouragement". In this cruel world all of humanity attempts to show his cruelty and violence. And from my strongest point of view, problem can be solved by encouraging students morally, to support and help by showing various ways that can withdraw out of harsh situations. Educational organisations should find out ways of innovative pedagogical methods. Only this way, problem of student pressure can be solved.

By way of conclusion, I find it necessary to reaffirm my point on altering the way governments and educational organisations see their future, otherwise serious problems can occur in society of ours.

***


What do you think of this Leisure Time Essay about studying?

You can let the writer know by leaving your comments below.

Comments for Leisure Time and Study

Average Rating starstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Jan 02, 2016
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Great Essay!
by: Al Muhammad

I have no words! But there were places, where I couldn't catch the meaning. What about others??

Jan 02, 2016
Rating
starstarstar
What is your view
by: Orifjon

Hey IELTSBuddy, sorry, I'm new and don't know your name. I'd read your criticisms with pleasure, please :)

Click here to add your own comments

Return to IELTS Essay Feedback Forum.