IELTS struggle for band 7

by Casper
(Philippines)

Hello everyone!

It has somehow alleviated my stress level after reading several comments in this forum. I am one with those having trouble in writing. Stuck at 6.5.

I would appreciate if anyone can comment with my essay so i know how to improve.

Thanks in advance.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

Globalization has brought about several changes in our modern times, one of which is increasing number of migrations between countries for purposes of education or work. In the advent of modern technology in communications and transportation, this movement is now easily attainable. When long-term goal is considered, the homesickness which migration can cause as well as the expenses it entails will all be worth it for the sake of independence, learning and career growth. These reasons will further be discussed in this essay.

One major drawback of migration is the psychological effect of distance away from home. Most people experience homesickness especially when they are alone with no support system. To site an example, a good number of nurses from the Philippines opt to move to the Middle East for work to be able to provide well for the family. Being in a totally difference environment surrounded by various nationalities and living with a different culture, homesickness is of high probability. Another disadvantage is the cost of living required overseas. Given the same scenario for instance, earning in a foreign currency generally is of bigger worth than Philippine peso. However, living away from home means spending money for basic commodities, which are in fact far more expensive. Additional expenses are also made with communication as well as travel expenses going to and from the Middle East and Philippines.

Turning to the other side of the discussion, one significant advantage of studying or working abroad is the independence and strength is brings out in every individual. For one thing, living alone means taking care of oneself, from food to laundry and when moving from one place to another. Support system is not as available as it is at home, and people compensate by holding on to will and faith. Second, education abroad provides learning that is modernized. To illustrate, studying in Harvard University in the USA can provide up-to-date and evidence-based information as well as state-of-the-art technology for teaching methods are utilized. The knowledge gained, especially when certified, will in most case be an edge for future careers anywhere in the world. Lastly, working abroad can enhance one’s career with the skills and capabilities that are gained during the experience. To site an example, for the IT specialists, being able to work in Singapore where information technology are quite highly advanced, there will be a definite increase in one’s credibility upon return in the Philippines.

After all things considered, migration to other countries for further studies or work will generally result to independence as well as personal and career growth. Although hindrances like homesickness and high cost of living is a possible threat, if managed positively, cannot deter the brighter future of migrating overseas can offer.